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Can this Twit Tweet?

March 29, 2012

Recently, I’ve been corresponding with some of my Twitter friends, and we’ve been laughing about mistakes we’ve made. When I first joined Twitter, two years ago now, I posted the following on a writers forum where I’m publishing my book, THREE HUNDRED ZEROES. All of my author friends were telling me that I MUST Tweet. I thought you might find it both interesting and informative. I’ve learned a lot since then, but it is interesting to observe my neophyte views of Twitter at the time. If I’m really lucky, I may have, by now, learned most of the answers to my questions.


Okay, at the risk of sounding like a Luddite, I’ve signed up for a Twitter account. I’ve received the confirmation email and all is well, or so it appears. I’m now a card carrying member of this secret organization. At least it is a big secret to me. I now have this weapon that is loaded and ready for action, problem is, I haven’t a clue where to aim it and what to do with it.

As I’ve said before, my cell phone is about ten years old and wouldn’t tweet if I threw birdseed at it. It’s battery is big enough that I could jump-start my motorcycle with it, but as far as I can tell, it won’t tweet. Having said that, I guess I’m limited to the PC/Web driven version of Twitter, which is fine.

However, what do I do now? I feel totally clueless. How do I tell folks that like 140 character messages about my 342 page book? Why would anyone that likes to read things in 140 character groups even be interested in reading a book?

Is there a simple (I mean really simple) tutorial out there that explains why, and how I can use this “tool?” I’d love to know what sort of messages you authors send out? I can picture some:

Hi, I just wrote a page of my new book, I’m all tuckered out, guess I’ll go to bed. I’m most creative when sleeping, just ask my wife.”

Here’s my book, a tweet at a time, “Part 1: It was a dark and stormy night…, (Part II tomorrow)

The voices in my head are telling me a story, quick, Tweet it before I lose it, I don’t have a pen.”

This Twit has learned to tweet; now I’m learning to quack, you’ll have to wait for the book to come out for that.

Etc. etc. etc.

Seriously, HELP!!! Where do I go from here? How do people find out about my work, and why would they? I’ve mastered (yeah, sure) web sites, blogs, and Facebook, but no matter how I pucker my lips, I have not yet successfully tweeted…


PS: Since writing this a year ago, I’ve learned a lot and I’ve become somewhat more accomplished, but I can still be considered a twit if you like. Here are a few recent comments that I added to the original posting:

I was a babe in the wood when I signed on. I sent out my very first tweet, “Hello world, this is my first tweet.” Then I waited, figuring someone would respond. I waited three days–nothing! I figured it had to be like ham radio, call out a CQ and wait and see if someone answers. I then figured out that, since I didn’t have any followers, nobody received the message.

Twitter is unique. The longest message can only be 140 characters, so U need 2 B creative and economical with words, (translated: so You need to be creative). Using a URL translator becomes a must. See for one example, there are others. Once you shrink a 200 character web URL to just a few, you can stick it in the tweets. Just like the other social media, you need to have followers (friends) that share your interests. I suspect that I may have had more readers pick up a copy of my book as a result of a tweet than from any other social network posting. Once you become proficient with Twitter, I recommend using an app like or to enhance your Twitter experience.

Feel free to follow me on Twitter if you wish. I’ll follow you, if I can figure it out. I think my address (is that what they call it) is @k1ypp . I said “think” because I’m not sure of anything at this point. I’m certain if you’re a Tweeter, Twitterer, Chirper etc., you’ll find me. I can’t understand why anyone would want to follow me when I don’t even know where I’m going.

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